morethanwordscansay.wordpress.com

xanga is getting boring and i dun like the layout anymore.lol. i tried to remove the ads but cannot. and it's that thing that makes me not like xanga. lol strange it is.

Before I came to R-AGE, I didn't know alot of things and honestly, I didn't know what it means and what it takes to serve God. I didn't even know that I can grow in the Lord through serving Him... In short, I never saw the true POWER of God until I came to R-AGE and re-dedicated my life to God once again last year (2008).

I came to R-age last year and people here really made me feel like I'm at home (: I didn't have to care about what they think about me because I'm assured that everyone's words and actions are genuine... So you can say that I was very active when I joined R-age, always wanting more of God and to know more of His people. Jeanie encouraged me to join CM-ing and so yes, here I am serving God in CM-ing.

previously, I always thought that the laolaos bother too much and even though I know that they ask because they care, I never knew what they were thinking and how they felt until I became a leader in R-age myself.

It's true it isn't easy serving God as a leader, especially when God wants you to grow from your ministry... I know very well that God wants me to learn something from this, but what I'm not very sure.

It's not that I wanna complain or whine about my ministry but it's ok to just type down my thoughts right. I never thought that CM-ing was THAT hard. at least nobody told me so and they all said that they grew in the Lord from this ministry and that's what spurred me on to giving it a try.. plus the fact that i really like to help and see youths grow in God, so yupp. the first half of the year was O...K... just that my cell is really ACTIVE and they tend to make abit more noise. but that's fine with me... half a year passed really quickly and youth camp was here. i watched them grow, i watched them seek the Lord, and yearning for more of God. then there was one night service that the kids were supposed to pray for their CMs, and it was then that i realised they really really mean alot to me. and i never thought that i love them that much till that night...

still, there wasn't anything tough.. until recently. i guess the tough thing about being a CM for me is really to talk about life with my kids. i don't wanna say things that they won't wanna hear but sometimes i just feel that there's a need to in order to make them grow.. i didn't know why jeanie or cheryl always asked me about those kinda things last time but now i know that it's really purely out of concern that i don't fall off the track. and now i feel that i'm being put in their shoes, and my kids in my shoes, and it's really hard to get this message across to them.. perhaps they have already gotten it, i don't know because actions speak louder than words.

UGH. i don't know what i'm saying already. all in all i just feel that i shouldn't be seeking approval and satisfaction from them because ministry is all about God and not them. ok. i don't exactly know what i'm trying to say here either. forget it. i guess i just have to ask God what's there to learn from here and keep praying about it.

alright.

look at this!! we're only eating roadside ice-cream but it meant ALOT ALOT!! cos we bought it from an uncle that's one of the God-sent angels! :D:D
you don't understand.
we had dinner at aston's, then after that i wanted to bring him to gelare, who knows, PS gelare closed. so we decided to go to the nearest one and that's in far east. walk until there...DAO BI already!!! nvm. then we went to shaw house, thinking that maybe go eat macaroons, but we still preferred ice-cream. so we tried our luck at taka. and guess what? it's also CLOSED! zzz.. we almost died. lol sadness overwhelmed me and isaac too could feel it. hahaha.. so we decided to go out of taka. he kept whining that he wants ice-cream, then i kept saying that maybe in the end we must eat roadside ice-cream, and he kept saying that he doesn't want it. hahaha
so as we were going up the escalator, i prayed something like "dear God, please send us angels that would appear right now to give us ice-cream to eat. in jesus name, amen."
then SOMEHOW, i don't know how, we both felt God showing us that indeed He has already sent us angels to give us ice-cream long long ago, it's just that we chose not to see them and chose to search for those that we thought would be better. and the angels were the roadside ice-cream uncles and aunties.
so we decided to settle with it and we found a place to sit down outside chanel, taka, and we had alot of fun! i'm certain those were God-sent angels. it can't be coincidence and "what-i-think it is" because isaac also confirmed it. (: we couldn't have had so much fun taking pictures and enjoying that traditional ice-cream if there was gelare. (: and indeed the ice-cream that we had tasted better than any ice-cream we could ever have because it was what God intended for us and it's the best :D:D i have a cool God! :D:D HALLELUJAH, thank You LORD :D:D

cool stuff! my kids are becoming like me! they not shy to take photos anymore! :D:D HAHA

things in G2 Youth and in Foolz 2 are getting so exciting!!

i can see God moving in this place...
youths are ever more hungry for the Lord..
because they've tasted the goodness of the Lord.
and now they simply want more... (:

during cell today, i could just sense that everyone is so on fire for God.
everyone wants so much of God. it's something that i've never felt before youth camp.
worship unto the Lord was simply too genuine.. i could feel that it was sung right from the bottom of their hearts that they want more of God and that they love to worship God...
mel and i didn't have to lead cell at all today..
it was fully led by the kids themselves (:
mel and i are really really very proud of them and we're very happy to see that they're rising up and growing (:
people say that they're not mature and not ready but we feel otherwise.
we think that all of them are capable of what mel and i are doing because we're all serving the same God (:
and it's the desire to serve that matters more to us than anything else and thus we decided that we should give them a chance to do a part in the cell (: (: (:

personally, when i started out as a CM, i also didn't know much abt the Word of God.
nevertheless, i was given the chance to take up this role and it's through CM-ing that i realise the importance of reading and knowing God's Word.
so i believe in the same way that God will reveal to them the importance of it too (: (:
through being a CM, i've also grown alot. and i've also learnt alot from people who're younger than me. says who that younger ones cannot teach older ones right.. (:
it's only a matter of whether the older ones are willing to learn from the younger ones or not (:

i see a generation
rising up to take their place
with selfless faith
with selfless faith

went BP for trg today and was utterly disgusted by their attitude.
they don't even seem like they want to win anything.
just train. then train for what? UGH.

after that headed down to lot1 with jun.
wanted to buy chippy's but haven't open.
1pm already still haven't open!
so i bought a waffle and bubble tea instead. UGH.

took a bus to G2 to study (supposedly).
in the end play tap tap luh, all sorts of games in yongjian's phone.
utterly disgusted by my self-discipline.
then only studied abit of kinetics.
so little that i don't even know which part of my brain contains the info.
and the reason i studied that is cos noella needed me to teach her.
if not for that, i also won't study. UGH.

then cheryl came to pass me some stuff for the youth camp.
so after that noella and i went to pack the stuff.
then some people came with more stuff and so we went Xroad to pack the stuff.
TOTALLY PISSED ME OFF.
ok, i'm utterly disgusted not with him but with myself.
disgusted cos i actually allowed my emotions to control my actions.
even more so disgusted cos it was in the house of the Lord.
and even more so disgusted cos there were younger ones in there too.
UGH. like totally.

dear Lord, i'm sorry for doing that. i'm sorry... help me Lord not to allow my emotions to overpower me and hence control the things that i would do.